Big Trouble In The GunShine State Featuring Dante From Devil May Cry
by xXxDoubleedgedxXx1337
Summary: Get ready for an excieting adventure filled with football, hot steamy action, drugs, love and Lust. As Zack Fair joins the Miami Hurricanes to win The Superbowl. It won't come easy, and the repurcussions go way beyond the game. Strap in, AND GET READY FOR SOME FOOTBALL.


Headstrong by Trapt was playing on the radio of Zack's Nissan Skyline while the sun shined brightly through the windows, and the wind messed with their hair. The sky was a clear blue and matched the color of their azure eyes. Miami's skyline rose defiantly across the water from them as they parked the car in the lot at the University of Miami, a long way from Midgar. Since these two were the most hotly recruited football players they already had their stuff moved into the dorms.

Both of them were wearing wearing the green workout shirts with the U, proudly shown on their chests. Zack held a football and was throwing it to himself as they both walked up to the dorm. "So who're our suitemates?" asked Cloud.

Zack laughed, "I told you a few times, man; Brandon Marshall and Barrett." They swiped their new student ID's to get into the mostly empty dorm, then after a quick elevator ride they found themselves inside their pre-decorated dorm. Everything they needed was in there, desks, whiteboards, speakers, a TV with a dreamcast hooked up, and even the buster sword was hung proudly over Zack's bed. "This is badass," he whispered.

"Yeah, there's a ton of room for activities," Cloud laughed as Zack jumped onto his bunk.

"And they're pretty big too," he gave it a pat. "Plenty of room for you, Tifa and Aerith.

Cloud rolled his eyes, "Shut up."

"You know they're gonna be right across from you, right?" Cloud smiled knowing that it was only one week until he had both Aerith and Tifa right there. Suddenly a knock came at the door bathroom door. "Must be our suitemate."

Cloud opened up the door to see Barrett. "Wassup, niggas!" he shouted entering the room. Cloud shook hands with him, using Barrett's new robotic hand. "My nigga, Cloud, my nigga, Zack, shit, we got the setup now."

"Hey fam," quipped Zack as he got off the bunk. "Who's your roomate?"

"Ay man!" In came Lil B. "Yo, I'm Brandon McCartney, but my niggas call me Lil B. My bitches call me BasedGod."

"Good to meet you. What are you going out for?" asked Cloud.

Lil B folded his arms. "Gonna be a runnin' back. It shouldn't be that hard with big nigga, Barrett making holes. What are you gonna be, Cloud, kicker?"

Zack laughed as Cloud shaked his head. "No, I'm a receiver."

"Ay man, stay positive. I know you're gonna be good." He checked his diamond studded watch. "Hey, first practice is coming. Let's do this shit."

The four of them enthusiastically went down and left the dorm in their loose fitting workout clothes. Walking across campus they tossed the ball around. Finally they came into the locker room and threw on their green helmets. Since they were all freshman, they had no logo's on them.

Walking out to the Orange Bowl was an odd experience for all them. Though it was the field that some of them had dreamed of, but there were no fans filling it, giving it a ghostly atmosphere and the sun beating down on them made it a certain type of hellish. And so, the four of them were just four bodies in a mass of players, all wearing the same workout clothes and helmets.

In front of them stepped Big Boss, wearing a suit and tie, but not a bead of sweat was on his face or his body and a cigar in his mouth. He scanned all of them with his one working eye. All the other players from Crackbone to Cloud, from Lil B to Barrett, all experienced some form of intimidation.

"Okay," began Big Boss. "For those of you pissants that don't know who I am, I'm Jack, but everyone who doesn't want to run a few extra laps calls me Coach. For anyone doubting me, just know, I ran an army at one point. Running a team to the SuperBowl, is no problem for me. Now, everyone get on with your drills, except Zack Fair. I want to see you.

Zack felt a chill go up and down his spine as the rest of the team dispersed and Big Boss walked up to him, making the intense eye-contact he can with just one. "Where did I recruit you from again?" he inquired.  
>"M-Midgar, sir," Zack stuttered.<p>

"Midgar, huh?" He turned around. "All right, come with me." Big Boss started moving over toward this building with Zack keeping up. "Time for some target practice."

"Wait are we working with guns or something?"

"Guns?" Big Boss laughed, "God, no, at least not in the physical sense." They entered the air conditioning of the warehouse. "I wanna see that cannon of yours, Zack." On the ground was synthetic grass and targets lying down on it. The room stretched out as far and wide as the field that the rest of the team practiced, but seemed even more ambient with just Big Boss and Zack there.

Grabbing a football off the rack, Big Boss flipped it over to his future quarterback. "Give it your best throw, rookie."

Without even taking a moment to think Zack took a step back and launched it, throwing a perfect spiral, with the arc of a rainbow all the way to the other side of the field. He looked confidently at the stone-cold expression of his coach. "Alright, let's see your accuracy. Hit the targets, the green ones only." The targets began popping, green ones being marginally obscured by orange ones. Zack called upon his memories from rifle practice in SOLDIER academy and countless hours of Counter-Strike that trained him to have pinpoint accuracy and the ability to snap from target to target almost quicker than his coach could feed the balls to him off the rack.

Big Boss hid it well, but he was impressed. He knew that with Zack at the helm, the University of Miami would win a sixth SuperBowl. "All right, you start your first game against Florida in two weeks. Good luck, kid."

Zack almost couldn't contain his excitement. "Th-thanks, coach. I'll make you proud."

He rolled his eyes. "Psssh, nothing personal, kid. Now get outta here. I gotta see how everyone else is doing. It' not like I have other coaches to manage you young guns."

Walking out to the field Big Boss observed his team as they went about their drills with Zack looked on quizzically, trying to find who his potential targets may be. After practice Big Boss went down his list and told his team who was in and who wasn't. "Zack, I'm going to need you to stay. There's something I gotta show you."

"Hey Cloud," greeted Zack as he stepped up to him with a bottle of Gatorade in his hand. Cloud was joined by one of his other teammates, a little shorter than him, but more lean.

"You get the job?" asked Cloud to see Zack's nod. "That's great. I'm gonna be starting at reciever. Had a bit of a tough time working with this guy doing coverage on me." Cloud gestured to his other teammate. "Uh, Zack, this is Crackbone." The two of them exchanged a confident handshake trying to inspire something in each other through their eye contact. "He was on me all day, shouting things like, 'I got them braindawgz!' and 'Cut 'em up!' He says he's from Norway."

"Yeah, I am from Norway," Crackbone added. "I mean, most of these faggots really don't got much on me. I'm just out here, cuttin' em' up, getting that bullshit." Zack and Cloud both looked at each other in amazement of being in the presence of such an insane genius. "Hey, we're gonna be ready for those Florida asshole-faggots. We gotta cut them illiterate faggots up."

"So this the QB?" asked a player with long blond hair and all green practice gear. A fairy flew out and buzzed around him as Zack nodded. "Nice to meet you. I'm Link, from Eldin Community College." They shook hands.

"He's another receiver," explained Cloud.

"Yeah, I'm more the sure option. Cloud though, he gets down there so fast."

"Both of you guys had trouble getting around me though!" proclaimed another player with a young face, slightly scarred below the eye, brown hair and black track pants. "You are?" Zack asked.

"Call me Vyse. I'm a linebacker from Arcadia High School." He broke down into his stance then laughed going back to normal.

Zack chuckled, "All right, well it's nice to meet all you guys. Looks like that superbowl is ours this year. Anyway Cloud and I better get going. See you later, guys."

"Yeah y'all have a good night."

As Zack when back to his coach, Cloud left to be all morose around campus and stuff like that. Unfortunately, he just couldn't bring himself to be the little emo git that he was back in Midgar. Miami was just too beautiful for that. Unable to wipe the smile from his face as he looked over the bay, he turned around to see both Tifa and Aerith walking towards him. As if things could not get any better for Cloud, both his main chick and his side-chick on campus a week early, even presenting a possibility of a minaj a tois.

"Well, you're looking good, college boy," muses Tifa as she comes up to him.

"Hey," said Cloud, giving them both hugs. "What are you guys doing here so early?"

"Well, they let people who work with athletics to come in," explained Aerith.

"So that means," began Cloud, brimming with anticipation.

"It means, I'm gonna be on the sideline to heal you guys." Aerith held up a green materia. "I'm willing to bet most of the trainers don't have something like this." She stepped back. "Matter of fact, you look like you need it right now." She cast cure 3 to make all of the wear and tear disappear from inside Cloud's body.

"Thanks," Cloud quipped.

"Anything for the star-player."

"And what are you gonna do, Tifa?"

She smirked and answered, "I'm already working out with the volleyball team." Just the thought of Tifa's ass in those tight shorts made all the hairs on his body stand at attention.

"That's great," said Cloud as his pants began to stiffen at his crotch. "I can't wait to see you out there.

"We can't wait to see you up there," replied Aerith, pointing to their dorm.

Cloud laughed, "Well, we don't have to. Zack's still got practice."

"Let's go then,"

As Cloud proceeded to have a threesome with Tifa and Aerith, Zack was back at the Orange Bowl with Big Boss. "Now, from what I've heard you Midgar boys fight along a turn based system. The party leader fights along side his or her group, but he gives the commands to the crew. Now, at any given time during that situation you have to worry about two other people. Now, at most you have four linemen, five receivers, a running back and yourself. Now for you, I want a sophisticated offense. So we've engineered this for you and every other player." He pulled out a helmet with a dark visor covering the eyes."Put it on," he ordered.

Zack slung the helmet on over his head. At first there was no difference from his normal helmet, maybe a shade darker, but then it lit up with a Heads Up Display. Menus with information and abbreviations hovered all around Zack's vision. "What is this?"

Big Boss lit a cigar. "Professor Emerick designed this. It has the entire playbook at your disposal and is synced up to every player. Everyone is gonna know their job."

"This is amazing!" Zack mentally scrolled through the entire list of plays.

"Damn right it is." He let the smoke seep out of his mouth. Now let's try this thing out, phantom scrimmage, now, Zack.

The weeks came and go. All those practices, drills, and collective learning of ebonics all amounted to this day, gameday at the Orange Bowl, the first step on the road to the SuperBowl. Almost every fan in the stadium made a U with their hands except the Gator fans who were doing the chomp, so it looked kinda like : =====, only with hands instead of inequality signs.

Zack waited inside the tunell with the rest of his team then running out with the white noise of the crowd and fireworks going off along with the song, Miss Murder playing on the speakers. "Starting quarter back, Zack Fair, on the job!" He went through his options on the hud, got some advice from Big Boss, then simply waited, taking in the atmosphere.

Zack, Link, Lil B, and Vyse all stood across from the captains of the Gators at center field, one of them being a girl in a high cut jersey, exposing her naval. Her hair was big and dirty blond, going down to her shoulder and her braids ornamented by orange and blue beads. Her name was Rikku. The four captains of the Canes were slightly unnerved by Rikku's hotness but nevertheless went through the handshakes and coin toss. Her confident face beamed at Zack's. He couldn't tell if it was supposed to illicit intimidation or excitement.

After another round of warmups, Zack found himself taking his first snap as Hurricanes QB. He went through the HUD, commanding every player on the player as if he was actually playing Final Fantasy and giving orders to his party. First they ran it twice, with Lil B getting a couple first downs. Zack then gave them a passing play. "Hike!" he shouted, almost immediately later getting the ball in his hand, as Zack always felt natural with a ball in his hand. He tried throwing to Cloud, only to have it swatted by Rikku.

"Throw it to me again!" screaned Rikku, so full of energy and passion. Zack thought otherwise and made up his mind on throwing to Link. Unfortunately, he couldn't see him open and once Rikku put it together she rushed through to Zack, tackling him and sitting on his chest, letting him take in the embarrassment of being taken down by a girl. She looked she was about to undress him and have sex with him right on the field, claiming Zack as her bitch. Smiling down on him as she got off, she mused, "That's what you get for not throwing it to me."

Zack tried to shake off what happened. It didn't hurt him all that physically, but it really wore on him mentally. He was embarrassed to think it, but he really wanted to surrender to Rikku in that moment. Ignoring any order from Big Boss to simply play it safe, he assigned another long route to Cloud. It actually looked perfect. He was so open, but it was all a trick as Rikku swooped and took the ball back for a touchdown, taking off her helmet then grinding on an invisible partner for her celebration. Zack looked on in a mix embarrassment and arousal while Lil B reassured him.

He was expecting to get hell from Big Boss but then he just said, "Ah yeah, it happens to the best of us, Zack. You just have to learn to put it behind you. These women will create failures in you but only if they allow you to think on a primitive scale. Why, I knew this girl a while ago named Eva and she..."

"Oh God, not this story again," thought Zack as the punt crew got in. "Listen, this is really interesting but I gotta try to score some points." Throwing his helmet back on, he trotted back out onto the field, lining up behind Barrett. "All right! Let's roll, boys!" He looked at the defense, then at the sideline to see Rikku was resting. Inspired by this, he started throwing down the field. Every pass, whether it was to Cloud, or Link was perfect and the players often went beyond the catch. Zack found himself about to throw his first touchdown but upon looking at the defense, saw Rikku. Feeling a little more confident in himself, he hiked the ball without changing the play.

She was seemingly everywhere, blocking out every option he had. "Fuck it!" said Zack before tucking the ball in his arm and then sprinting it in for a touchdown. Looking right at Rikku, Zack danced as if someone was grinding on him then pointed at Rikku.

Halftime came allowing Zack to chill and talk strategy with his two recievers. Cloud told them he wasn't feeling his best since he used all his energy the night before, having sex with Tifa and Aerith. Link though, was a devout Catholic, so he kept his virginity.

After some pep-talk from Big Boss they came out again. The Gators got the ball, and though Crackbone and Vyse, did their best to hit everything that moves, the team just got closer and close to scoring. Their pads smashed together in satisfying crunches often accompanied by trashtalk from Vyse. "You ain't shit! Y'all ain't got nothing! I've seen better hands on a fucking snake!"

Meanwhile Rikku taunted Zack from her bench. Zack stood up and shouted, "Rikku you better hope I never get back in there! I'm gonna kick your fucking ass!" But every successful Gators play left Zack more frustrated and Rikku even more smug.

"Hey, hey, just stay positive. We gotta do our job," encouraged Lil B. Those words triggered something in Zack. He thought of a new play, the likes of which nobody would see before.

"Just wait until you see what's on your hud."

Just then the Gators quarterback accidently threw it right to Crackbone who interecepted it and fell down, giving the Hurricanes the ball. "Oh my God! Oh my God! Destroyed!" He looked to Rikku who trotted out on the field. "Sit your Goddamn bullshit down, asshole. Zack's about to tear that asshole up."

Just as Zack did before, he neurologically assigned his play, this time telling everyone to block out the defenders except Lil B. He ordered him to run left. "Zack, we're both fucking running?" He turned back and nodded at him.

"Here's my idea. We both run left. If Rikku rushes for me, you get the ball." Basedgod nodded, accepting it. "All right, hike!" Zack took the ball and strafed left. Rikku, thinking Zack was gonna run, tried to tackle him. In a quick reflex he flung the ball out to Lil B. Once he caught it he sprinted out down the field, leaving most defenders in the dust before getting tackled. The players reassembled and Zack ran the play again, this time faking the toss to Lil B and running out for another first down.

"What's the matter, Zack? Can't run real plays to get by me?"

Zack laughed, "Rikku, you're gonna be mad quiet by the time things are done." They ran it again, same as before but more aggression came from the Gators. Fortunately, Rikku fell over and found herself getting hurdled by Zack as he ran into a touchdown.

And the game went on like this. With every play that Miami ran, Rikku's confidence in her team dissipated. And her slight soft spot for Miami grew. After all, bitches love winners. It was in the moment that Zack took his helmet off, showing his face to all his fans and the cameras. The moment she saw his face, sweaty and triumphant, as it should be after he has sex with her, made her want to transfer immediately to Miami.

Zack gave an interview after the game was over, but as all this was conspiring he never would guess that the evil forces at Florida State were watching him. "Do you think he poses a threat?" asked Dante, sitting in his lair under the Seminoles stadium. Also, it's the new shitty Dante, not the cool old one.

"Please, you really think they can stop me? I'm the ultimate lifeform!" proclaimed Shadow. "Remember, Dante all we have to worry about is selling drugs to our fellow students. It's almost like we're endorsed athletes."

"Except you can't do commercials for drugs," laughed Knuckles, entering the room. He looked at the highlights on the TV. "Man, there's no way these guys can cover me! I can glide right over them."

"And they think that Vyse can stop me?" joked Shadow. "They're going to need someone bigger and stronger than that."

Just then Mario barged into the room. "What the fuck is taking you guys so long?! A coach like me needs his damn players! Get out there!"

And so Dante, Knuckles, and Shadow, all rushed out to their field and quickly opened a can of whoop-ass on USF.

The next day at Miami's practice Zack saw something he almost couldn't believe, Rikku, in a Hurricanes practice jersey and shorts. Naturally, they were cut well above her knees. It gave her more mobility, but it just as well made her look so much more appealing. "Well, look at what Big Boss managed to drag over," chirped Zack as walked to Rikku with a ball in his hand. She grinned back at him. "I hope you know I'm a lot harder to intercept in practice."

"You save all your bad decisions for gameday?" she laughed.

"Oh, so those runs past you were bad decisions?"

"They are now."

"Good, I don't mind throwing a few balls your way."

"That's enough, children," interrupted Big Boss. "Rikku made a very big decision in transferring over. Let's all make her feel welcome."

Zack was about to say that he would do more than just that but decided to keep it in himself as the team began to get ready for their scrimmage in what became a chess match between Rikku and Zack, Every move had to be strategic, and usally had to fake a run or pass to get by her and every once in a while, one would get the better of the other to make a big play.

Long after practice was done that day Zack decided to go the beach, after all, he deserved a night in the sand with a bunch of beautiful ladies. He did a couple of two-hand touch games with the people then swam out for a while, after that he skimboarded along the waves. It was going really well and then he bailed, smacking right into Rikku, who also happened to be on the beach wearing that usual outfit from her second adventure through Spira, only this time with an orange bra. He opened his eyes to see her grinning and leaning over his head. "What is it with you and running into areas that I cover."

She extended a hand toward him and helped Zack up. "Just making sure you're always prepared," he laughed.

"I think I gotta worry about the other team a lot more than you." She noticed his skimboard, orange and green, just like Miami's colors. "So what're you doing out here."

Zack shrugged and smiled. "Just skimming some waves. You ever done that?"

She shook her head. "No, I think football is enough new things for me."

He put his hands out. "You gotta try new things, you know."

As a wave rolled in and wet the legs of Zack and Rikku, she replied with, "I got something else in mind."

Zck readied his board again. "Check this out." He streided out and threw it down on the water and road it along the shore, then riding back inward, over a wave that he used as a ramp. He then rode it back over to Rikku, spraying her in salt water.

"Nice," she mused.

"So where are you on campus?" Zack asked.

"Oh, I'm not living there. I got a beacch house right by here." She pointed over to it. "I was just about to head back in. You want to come inside with me?"

"Sounds good."

The two of them walked on over, stepping across the sand and wood up to Rikku's house, which was more of a mansion then anything. "So, you met anyone you like at the U yet?" she inquired, as they knocked the sand off their legs, entering the house.

"Not really, I used to have something with Aerith, but Cloud wanted to have both girls. And he's my teammate, you know. I always set him up for good shit."

"You ever take an opportunity for yourself?"

"From time to time," answered Zack as they walked into the kitchen. She opened the fridge and pulled out a few bottles of Heineken. "I like where your heads at." He grabbed one and started drinking.

"What made you think those were for you?" asked Rikku, keeping her smile.

"I'da thought you'd care more for your teammates," quipped Zack as she put her bottle down on the counter. "Lemme open that for you." He grabbed it then popped the cap off, squeezing it with his forearm muscle.

"Let's go up to the balcony," said Rikku as they walked up the marble stairs on their cold and bare feet. They returned to the humid air and the constant waves of the outside, watching the sunset under the Miami skyline. The cold beer kept them refreshed under the heat. Rikku basically pressed herself between Zack and the guard rail. "You know why I came to Miami?"

Zack took a gulp. "Cause we're a better school?"

She giggled then looked up at him. "It's because I know you're a winner." Illumination came to the sky in the form of orange and green fireworks. "You're not technically the best, but you're the type of a guy to find a way. And I love guys like that. "

"Do you know now?" Zack finished his beer. "You want to show it?"

Beaming back at him, Rikku replied with, "Oh my God, yes! I thought you'd never ask." As more fireworks popped through the starry sky, they began to make out. The two of them retreated back to the bedroom. The sex they had was some of the best of all time. It was gold medal worthy in the sex Olympics, if that was a thing. Both of them were giving it their best, cause sex is a team sport, just like football. Zack was thrusting it deep down the field that was Rikku's body. And Rikku was pushing right back at him, giving him that emotional and intangible feul that kept him going. They screamed as if they were in

Once this sexual tension was broken, nothing could stop the Miami Hurricanes. The very next Saturday, they raped Cal Berklee. Every successful play was accompanied by some dirty dancing, whether it was Rikku, provocative slides up and down after an interception, Vyse's dominant fist shaking after big hits, Lil B's cooking, Link and Cloud's coordinated shuffles and sambas, or Zack giving a crotch chop, right in front of Laci Green. Fuck that cunt bitch and her giant-ass teeth.

After the game was done Big Boss stood at the wall giving interviews. "What did you think of all the dancing and excessive celebrations from your team?"

Boss laughed, "Excessive?" Letting out a puff of smoke from his cigar he continued, "What you see on the field is one of two things. What I coach my team to do, or what I allow them to do.  
>And from there, the rout was on, Arkansas was blown out. Notre Dame came close, but delt the burn with Zack running in a touchdown then jumping and hitting a kid right in the face named Rex who likes to show other people's deviantart accounts to kids at school. Maryland was not worth the time, nor was Ohio State. Duke was a pitiful showing. Virginia tried but failed. And with every win, came more fun, more dancing, more drinking, more sex with Rikku.<p>

Thursday night before a Saturday game, Big Boss called his key players into the office, Zack, Cloud, Link, Lil B, Barrett, Vyse, and Rikku. Naturally there weren't enough seats so Rikku sat on Zack's lap.

"Gentlemen, and Rikku, we're undefeated, and naturally comes the assumption that we should be respected. However I feel that one team is lagging behind in that regard." He stepped away as the wall began to light up with a screen that began to display images of pure horror, of Tallahassee, of garnet and gold, of the FSU Seminoles. In a measure of pure cacophony, There was that team, rapping about how bad they were going to beat everyone.

"We are the Seminoles of Florida State. We know we good, some say we're great. Our goal is simple, best in the land. Walking to the beat of marching chief's band."

"Oh god," Zack buried his face in Rikku's back

Shadow appeared on the screen in full gear and began saying, "My name is Shadow and I love to run, just gimme the ball and I get the job done. Cause I had my own game back in 2-thousand-four, just gimme the ball and watch me score. Run with chaos control, turn on a dime, getting away and it's power time. But I don't wanna brag about this and that. I just want to do the Seminole rap."

"Are you fucking kidding?" shouted Vyse as he sat back in his chair, letting his eyes go toward the ceiling.

Next came Dante, standing proudly in his jersey with hat and sunglasses, in front of the backdrop of a Seminole logo. "My name's Dante, and I'm the QB. I got the best job as you can see. Cause I get to lead the offense attack, then watch the defense get the ball back. But if you get lucky and we can't run through, I'll just send a lot of passes through you. No matter what you do. I'm gonna score. And if you make me mad, I'll score some more."

"I am going to take that nigga's head off. Boss you better change me to defense," grunted Barrett.

"Sup, little bitches? Yo, my name is Knuckles and I ain't coming to this place her for shits and chuckles. So take a step back unless you wanna get knocked, cause I'm a bad motherfucker with some wicked dreadlocks. We got that O, bro. Opponent's got no, though. Ain't seen a team this good since Sonic Heroes. And I fly through the air with greatest of ease and I get a one-up, bustin up some TV's. Bitch please! Get your ass on the stability. We'll pick off your pass, and take away your credibility."

"Oh, I am gonna have a field day on him," said Rikku, with Zack's fingers sliding into her abdomen.

Finally came Naruto, dressed in red and gold with chains hanging from his neck. "Naruto Uzamaki, should know my name. But if you don't then I'm not to blame. I got world class speed, with moves to wow. You throw it my way you know I'll be there. See, I play my best when the game's on the line. I guess that's why they call me primetime. Some call me cocky, and I know that. But this, I gotta do, the Seminole rap!"

Big Boss shut off the video. "Barrett, you got your wish. You're linebacker now. Let's dance all over them."

Naturally, Zack was in his dorm room Cloud the night before the game. "Cloud, wake up." He said, nudging him in his bed.

"What?" Cloud groaned.

"I can't sleep."

"So?"

"Let's talk some shit to FSU." Zack grabbed his phone and called the hotel that he knew FSU was at.

"Hello, thank you for calling Motel 6."

"Hey there, I'm Zack Fair, quarterback for the Miami Hurricanes." Cloud got out of bed and went through the bathroom to Lil B and Barrett's room. The two of them were smoking a goodnight bowl. Zack walked in with him and said. "I need to talk to Uzamaki."

The lady on the phone replied. "Oh, hey Zack! I'm Yuffie from WuTai. I don't like Naruto that much either. So you I'll put you through. The phone ranged a few times before Naruto picked up. "Hello?"

"Naruto, this is Zack Fair. I'm just giving you a wake up call. Cause I'm gonna kick your ass in the Orange Bowl at in 15 hours. Hope you're ready cause you know I am."

"That's right bitch nigga! I'ma run right past you, Basedgod!" shouted Lil B. Cloud nabbed the phone. "Yeah you pussy little bitch. You think you're hot shit cause of that wrap video?!" Barrett then smashed a lamp, providing the background noise of broken class. "Gueess what? Your video was whack as shit. And you won't even be able to hang with me tonight." Naruto hung up. Though the hurricanes couldn't see him, they knew that he was freaked out. He left his bed and took a long look at himself in the mirror, trying to block out what just happened.

Barrett dialed up the phone again and got put through on the speaker-phone for both Shadow and Dante. "Ay! Wassup y'all bitch ass niggas?!" The two jumped, scared, as if someone else was in the room, then both looking to the phone as the source of noise. "It's Barrett. I'm on defense now, so I hope y'all get ready to have my size 16 shoved straight up your asses. The boys in green and orange got something to say too." He held the phone out to Lil B, Zack, and Cloud.

In sync, they all sang, "Sem-i-noles, come out and plaaaaaaaaaay!"

From then on, the game was on. The four of them woke up their teammates and walked out in mass to the Orange Bowl, got dressed in full uniform, and waited. The school got word of the massive presence and came out to the stadium, waiting with their Hurricanes. To entertain the fans, they ran a light scrimmage as a fan broke in and started blasting the seminole war-chant. The players didn't mind. They wanted to hear it, to get used to it.

The game inched closer. The networks arrived and so did the Seminoles, who were shocked to see that the Hurricanes were all ready for them. The time that they spent back in the locker room was too long for anyone wearing orange. Boss stepped in front of them, as they all sat down on their vinyl couches. "Gentlemen, what you showed was something that people are already going to be talking about for years to come. And I want you all to think about how you wanna be remembered at this school. Ask yourself, how you think my recruits ten years later remember this incident. That said, I hate this team just as much as you do. Harness that hate, be yourselves, because every one of you on the inside is a winner. Let's go."

The team walked down the hall, with their helmets hanging on their fingers. Just before they all ran out Zack made out with Rikku. Then came the run through the tunnel,through the smoke, to a sea of orange, with the stadium visually shaking, with the roar serving as a white captains met at center field, forgoing the handshakes. "Scared? Cause we ain't scared of you, bitch!" Shouted Barrett.

"We're the fucking boss!" Zack chipped in.

"You guys are going down," Rikku added as they all looked back at the petrified faces of those players that looked so cool in their little rap video.

"Give them the ball," said Vyse. He grabed the ref 's shoulder then leaned back, as if they were best friends at a bar. "We'll take that side."

At the kickoff, Shadow took the ball and ran scared, but a smart type of scared that got him upfield. The problem is that he found himself behind Dante. And across the wall of fat players protecting him, was Barrett. He eyed that little hedgehog and said, "You mine, fucker. You mine." Shadow was handed the ball and took it down the side but met shoulders with big ol' Barrett.

Dante helped him back up. "Who was that again?" asked Shadow. "Cause I need to avoid him."

"This isn't going to be easy," grunted Dante.

"I thought this was going to be like taking candy from a baby. That would have been fine by me."

The Canes were dominating but FSU was good enough to hang. Shadow could still break through the line, even if it still meant getting hit by Barrett or Vyse. Rikku still had a good coverage down on Knuckles while also keeping a steady stream of trash talk. The Seminoles were held to a field goal. On came the Hurricanes offense and Seminoles defense, led out by Naruto.

He pointed right down to Zack. "You're not getting anything through me. BELIEVE IT!" Zack simply replied by flipping him off. Just as was the case with the first series, the Hurricanes looked under complete control while FSU labored hard to stop what they could. Just watching her man in action from the sideline made Rikku's sexual flower burst into full bloom. She wanted to go out there, just to fuck him again. In Al-Bhed she cheered on her man.

As good as the Canes were, the Noles were getting better, and starting to catch up. Zack even had to resort to his old option play from the first game, often times getting hit in the shoulder by Naruto. It hurt, but the job was getting done.

After Zack put an ugly touchdown up, Dante took his turn. Knuckles sprinted out with Rikku glued to him like a shadow. Vyse and Barrett rushed at the line trying to get to Dante but came too late as he got the pass off. It appeared overthrown but Knuckles managed to extend his range by gliding, bringing his team more than halfway up the team. Dante ran up to Rikku and yelled, "You're no prom date, you ugly sack of shit!" After that he handed the ball to Shadow who sprinted away, getting a touchdown.

"Never again," grunted Barrett as Zack got control. "Never again."

"Hey, Uzamaki!" called Zack before snapping the ball. "Get at me! Hike!" Just like that Zack ran past the line and smashed through Naruto, using his whole shoulder before getting taken down. Link and Cloud both came in handy on quick routes that went beyond the catch. With a good set up, Zack again powered through more bodies to another touchdown.

The teams grinded at each other further with halftime coming. Zack dropped back again looking for Cloud but getting sacked by Naruto to end the half. It felt good for Uzamaki in the short term, but one look at the scoreboard reminded him who was in control, (Spoiler alert, not him.) Zack was escorted to the doctor's office leaving his team in a type of disarray, kept under enough control by Big Boss. He returned with Aerith to the room and everyone asked him about his shoulder. "Everyone shut the fuck up!" He shouted. "I'm hurt, dog! Don't ask me if I'm all right, fuck no! Barrett said we should dominate and we're not. I put my heart in this shit, dog! Let's go, man!" He lead the team back out to that same loving crowd.

Zack started the game back up by tearing his shoulder out by throwing a deep touchdown to Cloud. Dante came right back with a meticulous drive up the field capped by a score.

"Is your jersey dirty? Is that blood on there?" asked Lil B, walking onto the field with Zack.

Zack glanced over at the stain. "Dude, sometimes in games, I get blood on me, and I have literally no idea where it comes from."

This next time Zack ran it all the way up heavily employing that option play. "How about you pitch the ball before you cross the line?!" remarked Naruto.

"Quit your bitching!" Zack took his spot behind the linemen then flipped Naruto off before hiking the ball. He ran straight up, using his linemen as a ramp then dropped down into the endzone, spiking the ball, as if to put an exclamation point on what he just did. "This time, clamp the fuck down!" ordered Zack at his defense as he rushed over to the sideline. Rikku saw that intensity in Zack's eyes. She imagined how serious she was gonna get banged that night.

Just like Zack demanded, they stopped the Seminoles, with Rikku locking the game away with an interception and touchdwon. "Oh fuck yes!" shouted Zack, as he ripped off his helmet, stood up on the bench facing the crowd, and beating his chest. He looked right at one of the cameras on the field and boldly said, "WHAT?!"

The fans all ran out, storming the field. They took selfies with members of the team and carried Zack, hurt shoulder and all back to the locker room where the party. The war chant was playing in their locker room. Lil B started doing the chop and sang to the tune, "Fuck the Seminoles! Seminoles! Suck dick!"

From there, the city belonged to the Hurricanes. Lil B and Barrett went down to club Manhattan, getting VIP treatment and free drinks from the local gangsters and white collar criminals. Vyse, Link and Cloud took it to the beach, drinking and getting high with the local babes. "What's up, girl?!" shouted Link with a PBR in his hand and a joint in his mouth while Cloud macked on Tifa and Aeirth. Link rung his hand onto the waist of the girl He noticed she had his number, 86, painted on her naval. "Listen, I think I might need the Goron tunic with me, cause you're way too hot." She blushed and pushed her hair to he side.

"How often do you use that one?"

"Only on one's I've been Z-targeting all night." Navi flew out and began hovering around Link's target. "You enjoy the game?" She nodded. "You think I played all right?"

"Yeah, you were so good out there."

"Cool, how's about you and I go someplace a little more quiet. We can talk about the game a little more."

Meanwhile Zack was at Rikku's balcony smoking a blunt and holding an empty bottle of beer. Fireworks again lit up the as he and Rikku leaned over, rested, and ready for the night that they were about to have. Wins meant sex, but a big win meant anal.

Morning came but Zack, Link, and Cloud were not in the beds they went to sleep in. They all woke up with burlap bags over their heads. Upon hearing the sound of a snap they were all removed. The bright sun blasted their eyes but once it clered up they saw they were all tied down on lawn chairs, driectly across from Naruto, Dante, and Shadow, who looked even more scared than the unaware Hurricanes. Further examination revealed that they were on a yacht in the middle of the Biscayne Bay. The smell of a cigar met their nostrils and then in the middle of the six players stepped Sonic, with Rouge and Amy both at his sides. "What's up guys?" Sonic said in a Cuban accent he picked up from being in Miami so long. "Great game last night huh?" He crouched down in front of the Hurricanes. "Jou know who these guys are?" They all stayed silent with their hearts thumping on their chests. "Jou don't know? Well, I'll educate you, mis amigos. These men are my spokes people. They get money, dinero, from me because I use them to sell, my drugs to college students." Sonic took a puff of his cigar then laughed as Rouge and Amy proceded to do lines of cocaines in their bikinis. "But see, when they lose, nobody wants to buy anything from them." He got back up. "So, they mean nothing to us."

Stepping forward he asked. "ARE YOU WORKING FOR MR. BIG?!"

"N-no," Zack stuttered. "I don't know who that is."

"What is your relationship with Mr. Big?!"

"We don't know!" shouted Cloud.

"All right, all right," said Sonic as he grabbed a weed whacker and proceeded to whack the shit out of Dante's face. Cloud and Link tried to look away but had their faces held forward by Amy and Rouge respectively.

"Oh God, I have the weirdest boner right now!" screamed Link, thankfully getting lost in the sound of the weed whacker.

"Goddammit!" screamed Dante as the whacking stopped. "Who brings a weed whacker on a fucking boat."

Sonic smirked. "The same one who brings a gun to kill you!" He pulled out a desert eagle. "Shouldn't have thrown that interception." Then and shot Dante right in the heart. He looked to Shadow and Naruto, "All right, Knuckles!" called Sonic with a snap. The echidna emerged with a container of gasoline, drenching Naruto and Shadow.

"You guys shouldn't have played like shit."

"Let's light these pieces of chit up!"

"No! No! Do not like this chicken!" screamed Naruto just before Sonic tapped some of the hot ash off his cigar, forcing him and shadow into a blaze.

As the two of them burned. "So here's the proposition, boys," began Sonic turning his attention. "You guys will sell drugs for me, or you die the same way they did. You boys got 48 hours. Don't tell anyone." Sonic and Knuckles then threw the three off them into the bay.

After swimming back to Campus, the three of them ran to Big Boss' office. "Coach! Coach!" Shouted Zack as he burst through the door with Cloud and Link.

"Calm down. What is it?"

"Dante, he's, he's,"

"Dante? Yeah, he's dead." The three of the players were dead silent. "On top of that, Rikku's been kidnapped."

"No." Zack's head lowered. "How did you know?"

"How do I know? Let me ask you something. Did you hear anything about Mr. Big?"

"Yeah, who the fuck is he?" demanded Link.

"Gentlemen," Big Boss picked up a cigar and began smoking. "That would be me. Mr. Big is simply the name they pinned on me. I'm the FBI's informant, so they can pull the drug ring."

"So who are you calling in?" asked Zack.

Boss smirked. "The best."

Suddenly they heard the tones over the office's loudspeaker, "SIERRA, HOTEL, INDIA, ECHO, LIMA DELTA, S.H.I.E.L.D" Through the back door came Seth Rollins, Dean Ambrose, and Roman Reigns.

"The SHIELD?" said Cloud. "But I thought they were just WWE wrestlers."

"That's what everyone thinks," quipped Ambrose. "They think, cuase they don't know. But our role is just a cover up for the FBI's best black ops team."

"Don't think that it's just us. Zack, Cloud, Link, we need you for this op, too. Someone personally attached to the case can get things done a lot quicker," added Rollins. "

"By this time, he already knows he talked that you talked to Big Boss. So let's get a move on. First we gotta get Knuckles," concluded Roman Reigns before chipping in, "Believe in the SHIELD."

The six of them walked out to a black SUV and drove down to a warehouse right by the docks. Zack quickly grabbed a football as he left the van. "You guys lead in. We'll cover your back," said Roman Reigns. Following the orders The Hurricanes entered to see a warehouse full of henchemen.

"What's up, guys?" Zack said flipping his ball.

"Oh we got us some football cops here!" yelled Knuckles from two of them rolled out from behind Zack and his crew. "The quarterback is about to get sacked by a forty-five. Bench these clowns, boys!" Just as those words left his mouth, the SHIELD came in and shot all the henchmen. Knuckles tried to run away but was hit right in the legs by a deadly accurate ball thrown by Zack. The trip forced him to fall down to the first floor. Returning to conciousness, he found himself in the center of the six cops.

"Oh, uh, hey guys," he tried to laugh before getting punched right in the face by Cloud.

"Where's Sonic!" Link demanded, kicking him in the chest.

"Where the fuck is Rikku?" added Zack, stomping on Knuckles's head.

He got back up with a new black eye. "I ain't saying anything! You're not playing by the rules. This is unecesary roughness!"

"Oh yeah?"challenged Link. "Well I didn't hear a whistle." He gave Knuckles a firm slap across the face.

"And I don't see a flag." Cloud then grabbed the head of Knuckles and smashed it with his knee.

He crawled back putting his hands up. "Okay, okay, he's got her over with Rouge." Knuckles proceeded to give the location that Sonic was hiding at.

All this time Rikku was held up in an empty of a condemned building. Tied to a chair in a room full of C4. "He's not coming for you," In stepped Rouge, strutting closer over to Rikku. "What's the matter?" she asked grabbing her face. "Come on, let's make this a little fun. The last thing you feel can be the orgasm from this." Out of her pants she pulled out a vibrator. It began to buzz forcing a field of goosebumps to rise up on her skin. Rouge rubbed it up on Rikku's arm, teasing her as Sonic looked through the window of the building from a rooftop across the street with a cigar in his mouth and a bottle of whiskey in his hand. "Yeah, thees is how you throw bomb." He grabbed the remote, ready to blow up the building once Rouge was done with Rikku.

On a neighboring rooftop bursted Cloud, chucking a ball over to Sonic, hitting his bottle and cracking it. Sonic looked back at Cloud. "Incomplete, bitch." He turned his attention back over to the window to see Rouge's dead body on the ground and Rikku free. The next thing he saw was another football coming for him, knocking his cigar out of his mouth. The ash lit the fires as the touched the whiskey, setting Sonic ablaze. As the fires charred his skin he saw Zack at the condemened building spread out his arm and shout, "How's that for Fantasy Football, fucker?!"

He left the building and took a long walk with Rikku back to campus to meet Link and Cloud. "Good job, guys. Looks like our work here is done."

"Not quite." Link put his finger up.

"We still gotta win us a Superbowl."

"Just tell me when and where."

Big Boss stepped in front of them. "Next Saturday right here, against the New England Patriot."

"Well, let's get to practice then."

Almost like it was any other game, the Hurricanes came out and dominated in their traditional fashion. Cloud caught the big passes, while Link earned yards after his catches, Z-targeting and skipping around his enemies. Basedgod ran around or through those who defended against him while Zack dropped back and passed with an ease and calm about him he had never once experienced. The defense was there too. Barrett rushed Tom Brady, that metrosexual dickbag while Vyse stuffed them any time they ran. Crackbone forced recievers to drop the ball while Rikku swooped in and picked balls out of the sky like cherries. The Hurricanes were already up by so much that Big Boss let Zack go out and play guitar with Nine Inch Nails for the halftime show. Zack put a helmet back on and let the scoring continue until the clock stopped with the board reading: Hurricanes 98 Patriots 1.

While confetti rained down on Zack and his Hurricanes, his lips met with Rikku's and the party was once again, with the Hurricanes getting the keys to the state of Florida. Vyse and the Blue Rogues invaded Tampa Bay while BasedGod was offered more bitches than he could count as he and Barrett claimed the entire gang scene in Florida. Link and Cloud were drowning in pussy. They were hitting it raw on every girl. Zack was content staying on the field, stargazing with Rikku, seeing the Goodyear blimp with a sign that read, "Zack Fair is boss."

"You know we couldn't have done this without you, right?" Zack asked.

"Yeah, we make a good team, don't we?"

"You wanna do this next year?"

She laughed, "Let's just try to enjoy this."

Zack hugged her. "I just gotta think of some way to repay you for all the help you gave me."

She let out a giggle. "How's that?" He stepped in front of her.

"How about one date?"

"Is that even necessary?" While the field lights dimmed they started kissing, and finally, for the first time in their life made love, not just had sex, but made love. From then on, these Hurricanes would walk together forever bound, forever champions.


End file.
